On Same-Sex Marriage: I Choose Love, I Choose Grace

I am saddened.

A few hours ago, I read post after post from friends on Facebook, blogs, and twitter either rejoicing or mourning over the US Supreme Court’s ruling on the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as unconstitutional and dismissal of Proposition 8, thereby effectively restoring same-sex marriage in California. The cry of the people on this paradigm shift range from extreme joy to acute disgust. This event, without doubt, marks a big leap towards a profound alteration of perspectives in what marriage in America looks like.

And yes, I am saddened with this decision. As a Christian, I stand by the biblical definition of marriage as limited only between a man and a woman.

But I will not condemn those who have chosen to live by a different definition of marriage from what I stand on. I will not put them down and classify them as second-class citizens. I will not respect them less because of what they believe in.

Instead, I choose love.

I choose grace.

For I have received love; I have received grace. I will need more of these every second of my life. Thus, I want to also give love.

Give. Grace.

I have friends, best friends, who are homosexuals. They are fathers, husbands, brothers, uncles, and friends. They know that I love them and care for them deeply; they also know that I do not agree with their lifestyle. Yet, I do not have to push down their throats what I firmly believe to be the truth. After all, I am not God.

So when they continued asking Him, He raised Himself up and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.” John 8:7

I am as sinful as they are. Probably, worst. I am not righteous in my own right, only by the blood of Jesus.

So, no, I will not throw a stone at those who have chosen to live the way they want to live even if it looks notably unlike my choice.

Only, I will continue to love. I will continue to give grace. I will continue to share the Gospel. I will continue to act as my conscience dictates. I will continue to fight for what the Bible speaks of. I will continue to cast all of my votes in tune with God’s truths as revealed in His Word.

Even as I continue to do these and nothing significant pans out of them, I know that I have done what my God has asked of me and I obeyed Him. To me, that is enough.

Only God can change hearts. Only God can carry the load that we are trying so hard to carry on our backs.

Only God can.

We fight for what is right. We defend our faiths. But we also love. We also give grace. How that looks like in your life is how God has shown you to live.

No matter how strange the world becomes, God is still on the throne. God is, literally, still in authority over all.

He will remain in authority without the limits of time or of changes our society dons.

(Note to Readers: I know that same-sex marriage is a hot-button issue and quite political in nature, but this post is not intended to open up political arguments to point fingers at who is right or who is wrong. I have no desire to debate on that matter. I only want to spark a conversation about how we, as Christians, should respond to this significant change happening in our society. And to me, love and grace should be our response. We all need Jesus — all of us. Not one person needing Him less or more than another.)

June 27, 2013
11:20 p.m.,
Krabi, Thailand

© 2013 Kezia Lewis. All Rights Reserved.