I feel a great deal of angst staring at a blank page. I have been at this since this morning, frantic and uneasy on how to write about my year 2018. It’s now three in the afternoon; ah, what to say? It was a good year. It was a hard year. 2018 began with a … Continue reading 2018: A Personal Reflection
Green Card About a month ago, I watched this Filipino TV show where a friend of the heroine suggested a solution to her problem: marry an American guy to get a green card. She is conflicted about this advice because she considers marriage sacred. So she goes to church to pray about it. She sees … Continue reading Subtle Lies
I get angry so quickly lately. I am ashamed to admit that it’s been easier for me to snap at almost anyone (often, my husband) even with the smallest of things than to extend love and grace. My patience is shorter; I explode for no reason. I have been asking myself why — wondering what brought this on. I was never like this before. There just seems to be so much anger in my heart.
Today, I found the answer to my question.
I need to forgive.
As hard as it is for me to admit, I have to confront this truth about myself: I am unforgiving. Continue reading “For My Own Sake”
Today is our 3rd year anniversary.
And for some reason, within the last few days, I keep reading blog posts, essays, and articles about love and marriage more so than anything else. I reckon it’s that season for me where the big theme is on this unquenchable subject on love. Or maybe my attention on this topic is exceptionally heightened during this special time of the year. Either way, I really find love and marriage a stimulating motif for discussions. So, I delve in and read a substantive amount of written works about it.
Although, I have long woken up from my vivid dreams of the so-called ‘perfect love affair’ with ‘the one’ and abandoned lies about love and marriage I have held for so long. I think it is worth dissecting to grow more and to pass on what I learn: not only to my children one day but to women I know who are holding on to the same pattern of lies, dressed in different events, which I have gone through. Continue reading “Without God, I Don’t Think We Would Still Be Married”
Somewhere out there is my Mr. Right. When I find him, I will be whole and happy.
I know I bought this lie.
We have been inundated with movies and books brandishing fairytale-like love stories and insanely romantic love affairs filled with characters so in love and so “right” for each other; or preached at, by some of our churches and well-meaning Christian friends, that finding the “right Christian guy (or girl)” equals perfect happiness plus the assurance of a struggle-free marriage implying that Christians ought to have it all together. It is almost impossible not to think that we deserve the kind of love story portrayed in our modern-day media — that story with the right one — as we are skillfully bombarded with it daily. Our vision of marriage is that of a couple whose story opens with a great line and ends with an exceptional closing scene in which the length in between can be measured by the number of pages or hours. Continue reading “The Illusion of the Right One: How I Found Freedom from the Lie”